So the coach put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing he was missing was the perfect quarterback. He scouted the colleges, the Canadian league and even the Eurpoean leagues but could not find the perfect quarterback to ensure a Super Bowl Win
He then watched CNN, and he saw a war zone in the West Bank, and he saw an Israeli soldier with a truly incredible arm. He watched as the soldier throw a hand grenade into the 10th story window...BOOM! Another grenade right into a chimney from 75 yards away..BOOM. Another grenade into the window of a car going 90mph...bullseye!
"I got to get this guy!" the coach said. And then locates the man and brings him to the United States to teach him the great game of football. The Bears would go on to win the Super Bowl behind the arm of the young man and he becomes the hero of football!
When asked what he wanted, all he wanted to do was call his mom.
"MOM! I just won the Super Bowl!" The man said jubilantly into the phone.
"I don't want to talk to you" the woman on the other end said. "You're not my son!"
"But....Mom....I don't understand....I'm a hero! I'm world famous!"
"No!" The woman said. "Let me tell you something! At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us! The neighborhood is reduced to rubble. Your brothers just got beaten within an inch of their lives! I have to keep your sister in the house to keep her from getting gangraped!"
The old lady pauses, then tearfully adds...."Son...I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago!"
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